Sunday, 4 May 2014
Gnostic Dream
'Dream, Dream!'
The Angels scream,
'Nothing can be
As it doth seem,'
'Sleep, Sleep!'
The Angels weep,
'Nothing of Earth
Can mortals keep',
'Fly, Fly!'
T'was Man's reply,
To hold the Earth
And walk the Sky.
Sunday, 27 April 2014
Monday, 27 January 2014
Light Casts No Shadows, part 13
'In my youth, I was a good man,' I began. 'But I spent money too free, and enjoyed wagers too much. I was happy married and very much in love. My career as an officer was promising-'
'What does this have to do with me!' she protested.
'Allow me to continue... My fate changed dramatically during the war against Napoleon. In Spain I was taken prisioner for several months. My platoon had be wipped out, and I was presumed dead. At the time I owed a great deal of money, most of it to Thornton. In my absence he seized all of my land and property to cover my debt.'
'My husband?'
'Aye. He also tied to seduce my wife. I have been informed that my wife never believed that I was dead. She loved me still, and despiced Thornton.... It was not enough for him to take a man's property, he wanted my love also. when she refused, he murdered her. That was the sort of man he was. Nothing could be proved in court. As you know, Thorton was a powerful man with some influence. I knew nothing of this untill long after I had escaped from that hell of a jail. There was nothing I could do about it untill after the war. As soon as I returned to England, Jacques and I swore revenge. we would take everything from Thornton. That is why to are my prisioner. Revenge... Perhaps justice.'
Then I noticed that the lady was crying, I did not know why... Her hopelessness or mine?
'I shall get some more food for us,' said I, and walked away.
Jauques was sat on the stairs. A candle beside him, and his sword across his lap.
'Where are you going?'he asked, a sly smile across his face.
'Upsairs, to get food.'
'You don't need food, there is plently of wine down in the cellar.'
'Today I do not care for wine, I require food for the lady and I.'
'You ought to stay down in the cellar where you belong.'
'Out of my way,' I growled.
'I shall not let you pass.'
He stood and held his sword on guard.
I drew my sword and adopted a fighting stance.
He lunged at me, but I dodged his blade. I aimed for his exposed right led as he was off guard, but missed. He stepped to one side and I advanced.
We swung for each other at the same moment. our swords locked in the air- then my sword passed through his, and clean through his body.
My sword passed through him like a bird flying through mist.
He laughed at me.
There are times in the lives of men when we live like beasts, compelled ever forward by our base desired and instincts. There are times when we live like madmen, and our reason abandons us- we dance in the dark like lunatics. There are times when we live without the light of reason...
And there are times when we regain that guilding light.
I walked directly through Jacques, like he was no more than fog.
A fog in my mind.
'You shall never be rid of me,' he called out from behind me.
'What does this have to do with me!' she protested.
'Allow me to continue... My fate changed dramatically during the war against Napoleon. In Spain I was taken prisioner for several months. My platoon had be wipped out, and I was presumed dead. At the time I owed a great deal of money, most of it to Thornton. In my absence he seized all of my land and property to cover my debt.'
'My husband?'
'Aye. He also tied to seduce my wife. I have been informed that my wife never believed that I was dead. She loved me still, and despiced Thornton.... It was not enough for him to take a man's property, he wanted my love also. when she refused, he murdered her. That was the sort of man he was. Nothing could be proved in court. As you know, Thorton was a powerful man with some influence. I knew nothing of this untill long after I had escaped from that hell of a jail. There was nothing I could do about it untill after the war. As soon as I returned to England, Jacques and I swore revenge. we would take everything from Thornton. That is why to are my prisioner. Revenge... Perhaps justice.'
Then I noticed that the lady was crying, I did not know why... Her hopelessness or mine?
'I shall get some more food for us,' said I, and walked away.
Jauques was sat on the stairs. A candle beside him, and his sword across his lap.
'Where are you going?'he asked, a sly smile across his face.
'Upsairs, to get food.'
'You don't need food, there is plently of wine down in the cellar.'
'Today I do not care for wine, I require food for the lady and I.'
'You ought to stay down in the cellar where you belong.'
'Out of my way,' I growled.
'I shall not let you pass.'
He stood and held his sword on guard.
I drew my sword and adopted a fighting stance.
He lunged at me, but I dodged his blade. I aimed for his exposed right led as he was off guard, but missed. He stepped to one side and I advanced.
We swung for each other at the same moment. our swords locked in the air- then my sword passed through his, and clean through his body.
My sword passed through him like a bird flying through mist.
He laughed at me.
There are times in the lives of men when we live like beasts, compelled ever forward by our base desired and instincts. There are times when we live like madmen, and our reason abandons us- we dance in the dark like lunatics. There are times when we live without the light of reason...
And there are times when we regain that guilding light.
I walked directly through Jacques, like he was no more than fog.
A fog in my mind.
'You shall never be rid of me,' he called out from behind me.
Sunday, 26 January 2014
Light Casts No Shadows, part 12
The new day I was restless.
My gold hoarde no longer pleased me, and all the wine tasted sour.
I roamed from cell to cell, lost in thought. Morbid curiousity drove me towards the oldest and most horrid part of the cellars, but when ever I came close to the final door I retreated.
I remembered my lost Annebell. It had been 30 years since we had married, and 4 since she had died. 26 years which had gone so fast, and 4 which had been so terrably long.
I remembered the first time that we had meet, 32 years ago. I was hunting with my dogs and squire and she was walking with her sisters. It was spring, and the forest was filled with wind flowers. She looked so at home in the forest, like some Wood Nymphe or elven lady.
I remembered the way her eyes used to shine, like two tiny stars.
For a moment I thought I saw her before me. A vision or some fit of madness. But it was no Annabell, it was my prisioner.
She was clearly startled. She almost jumped, then retreated to a corner.
'Don't be afraid,'said I. 'I will not hurt you.'
'How can you say that when you have hurt me so much already?'
It was a fair question.
She grew more confident when she saw that I made no advance or sign of agression.
'I demand an explanation for your cruel mistreatment,' she said.
'Then you shall have one...'
My gold hoarde no longer pleased me, and all the wine tasted sour.
I roamed from cell to cell, lost in thought. Morbid curiousity drove me towards the oldest and most horrid part of the cellars, but when ever I came close to the final door I retreated.
I remembered my lost Annebell. It had been 30 years since we had married, and 4 since she had died. 26 years which had gone so fast, and 4 which had been so terrably long.
I remembered the first time that we had meet, 32 years ago. I was hunting with my dogs and squire and she was walking with her sisters. It was spring, and the forest was filled with wind flowers. She looked so at home in the forest, like some Wood Nymphe or elven lady.
I remembered the way her eyes used to shine, like two tiny stars.
For a moment I thought I saw her before me. A vision or some fit of madness. But it was no Annabell, it was my prisioner.
She was clearly startled. She almost jumped, then retreated to a corner.
'Don't be afraid,'said I. 'I will not hurt you.'
'How can you say that when you have hurt me so much already?'
It was a fair question.
She grew more confident when she saw that I made no advance or sign of agression.
'I demand an explanation for your cruel mistreatment,' she said.
'Then you shall have one...'
Friday, 10 January 2014
Light Casts No Shadows, part 11
It was, I believe, soon after that conversation that I had the idiot idea of counting my money. I was probably drunk, for the wine cellar was a constant temptation.
There was, I recall, a great deal of it, Jacques interupted me before I finished counting it.
'Enough gold for you?' he asked.
'More than he took from me... But the important thing is that 'tis all his gold. All that he had, because he took all from me.'
'So you keep saying. But what of his wife?'
"My prisioner?'
'He took your wife from you, but you have not yet taken his wife... fully. You must take her to bed or kill her, it is the only way to complete our revenge.'
Damn me, because for a moment I was tempted. I thought of her alone in the vaults, her beautiful eyes shinning in the darkness. I remembered holding he as I carried her away from her slaine husband. The softness of her skin, her hair brushing my face. She was pretty, and she was mine...
I have done many bad things in my life. In the service of my country, I killed many men and wounded many more. At times I took satisfaction from the killing. Then I was a Highwayman- a thief. Then a murderer. There were few sins that were new to me.
But I am not a monster.
'Damn you!' I shouted at him. 'Out of my sight, French brute! I'm going to get more wine...'
Then I knew: sooner or later, I must kill Jaques.
There was, I recall, a great deal of it, Jacques interupted me before I finished counting it.
'Enough gold for you?' he asked.
'More than he took from me... But the important thing is that 'tis all his gold. All that he had, because he took all from me.'
'So you keep saying. But what of his wife?'
"My prisioner?'
'He took your wife from you, but you have not yet taken his wife... fully. You must take her to bed or kill her, it is the only way to complete our revenge.'
Damn me, because for a moment I was tempted. I thought of her alone in the vaults, her beautiful eyes shinning in the darkness. I remembered holding he as I carried her away from her slaine husband. The softness of her skin, her hair brushing my face. She was pretty, and she was mine...
I have done many bad things in my life. In the service of my country, I killed many men and wounded many more. At times I took satisfaction from the killing. Then I was a Highwayman- a thief. Then a murderer. There were few sins that were new to me.
But I am not a monster.
'Damn you!' I shouted at him. 'Out of my sight, French brute! I'm going to get more wine...'
Then I knew: sooner or later, I must kill Jaques.
Friday, 3 January 2014
Light Casts No Shadows, part 10
She looked at me with cold, dead eyes. Disgust and discomfort written, equally clearly, across her pretty face. I put the tray, blankets and clothes beside her. She did not shift from the corner where she sat.
'You are my prisoner,' I told her, 'but now you may leave this cell. You may go any where in the cellars, but you may not leave the cellars.'
She looked up, not at me but at the door behind me.
'You will find clean water beyond the wine cellar,' I continued. 'But I recommend that you venture no further, especially not down the old tunnel.'
She ignored me. I turned to leave.
'Madman,' she hissed.
'Pardon?' I asked.
'Madman! ... You are truly mad. You killed my husband... enslaved me! ... I hear you talking to yourself. Madness!'
'I don't talk to myself.'
'Then who do you talk to?' she demanded.
'Jacques.'
'And who is Jacques?'
'We meet in France. He is my enemy.'
Again, I turned to leave.
'What do you want of me?' for the first time, her voice betrayed sadness.
'You are my prisoner. I need nothing else from you.'
'You are my prisoner,' I told her, 'but now you may leave this cell. You may go any where in the cellars, but you may not leave the cellars.'
She looked up, not at me but at the door behind me.
'You will find clean water beyond the wine cellar,' I continued. 'But I recommend that you venture no further, especially not down the old tunnel.'
She ignored me. I turned to leave.
'Madman,' she hissed.
'Pardon?' I asked.
'Madman! ... You are truly mad. You killed my husband... enslaved me! ... I hear you talking to yourself. Madness!'
'I don't talk to myself.'
'Then who do you talk to?' she demanded.
'Jacques.'
'And who is Jacques?'
'We meet in France. He is my enemy.'
Again, I turned to leave.
'What do you want of me?' for the first time, her voice betrayed sadness.
'You are my prisoner. I need nothing else from you.'
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